Have you ever wondered why some things you have asked God for never seem to come to pass?

The fall term at the local Bible College will start in a few days, and I will be teaching the second year core ministry course on Signs, Wonders and Revivals. The course covers some of the most fascinating and challenging areas of Christendom. I have experienced signs and wonders myself. I have seen several miracles happen in my own life. I have prayed for miracles to happen for others and have seen them come to pass. I witnessed the miraculous healing of a close relative in 1970 at a church meeting in Toronto, Canada. Moreover, I am one of those people who has been slain in the Spirit, fallen backwards and landed on the floor when a minister prayed for me. Indeed this has happened several times and with different ministers, one of whom was a female evangelist with the gift of Healing.

And yet with all that first hand experience and even teaching the subject, I still wonder about some of the things I see on television and in person when it comes to healing. I wonder about the healings that are claimed to have occurred, and if they are real. I wonder why them and not me? My late son-in-law went to every kind of healer including bathing in the waters at Lourdes in France, as he fought multiple myeloma for nearly five years before succumbing to that terrible disease. He became a Christian one glorious Easter morning two years before he died, but he died, and all our prayers and his efforts were seemingly to no avail. He was too young to die, there was so much to live for, it seemed so unfair, but he is gone.

How about other things aside from healing, things like unanswered prayers? I decided back in November 1995 that I would pray everyday about two things I wanted to come to pass. That now translates into almost six years of daily focused praying, but so far nothing has happened to even indicate that my prayers did anything more than bounce off the ceiling if they got that far. No answers! It seems so unreasonable, I don’t understand why it has to be this way, and sometimes I get to feeling sorry for myself over those unanswered requests. I think of the story Jesus told about the poor widow lady who went to the unjust judge with her request over and over again until she wore him down. I feel like I have surely exceeded her efforts–but unlike the story, I still have no relief.

How long, O Lord, How long?

The prophet Habakkuk asked the Lord, “How Long?” In the end, Habakkuk wrote that he had decided to praise the Lord and live for Him no matter what was wrong. God gave him deer’s feet so he could climb above it all and live up in the high places rather than in the daily fray–that if not managed well can consume us all. How about you? Are you feeling sorry about your plight? Are you asking “How Long?” Are you endeavoring in prayer? The answer is simple. We are to keep on doing what we know we should do. Do not give up. We certainly do not know the mind of the Lord or His timing. But we must hold on to Him with unshakable trust. What we think is the best maybe is not the best. Trust your God more than your idea of what is best. It is just that easy, even if we, like my son-in-law, have to die in the process. God’s plan is better than ours.

This article by Pastor Mur first appeared in the September 2001 issue of Pneuma Informer published by the Pneuma Foundation.

My story starts when I turned awkwardly to look at the new score board in the nearby University Arena, someplace where we have regularly attended various athletic events for the past 17 years. Our current season started in August, and we were there. The announcer was introducing the glorious new score board, and the thousands in attendance all looked at it as the lights came on. I was sitting directly under and somewhat to the side of the new score board, and when I stretched my neck to see it I knew right away I had hurt myself.

That was eight months ago, and I have struggled with my neck and the discomfort it has since presented everyday. I have been to all kinds of doctors and trainers, prayed for relief as have others on my behalf, and while I am somewhat better, I have not had complete deliverance from my woes. I simply hurt all the time, just a dull ache that transverses my shoulders and my neck. The pain never goes totally away.

The discomfort climaxed in January when my wife took me to the ER around 1:00 AM one night. They took some X-rays, gave me an injection of morphine, a prescription for valium, and sent us home where I slept for two weeks. As that season came to an end, I found that I had lost all my leg strength, and that I could not stand. My balance was gone, and I was in danger of falling— I did fall five times.

I weigh more than I should, and more than my wife can lift, so she needed help to get me upright or seated. My wife somehow came up with two men to lift me each time I fell. She followed that up with a wheel chair, then a walker as I started to improve, a chair for the shower and a cane. Now I walk almost like I always did.

My plight meant I needed help for the simplest things, and I watched with gratitude and admiration as my wife assumed the responsibility to provide all I needed. That included getting into the shower with me and washing me. This went on for three or four weeks.

We have been married a long time, and I wondered what I would have done without my bride who took care of me with a tender grace—an expression of care that meant I was important. Jesus told us about the difference between a shepherd and a hireling. I get to talk to people about their lives and marriages, and I have experienced the value of a spouse who cares. We have one daughter who lives on the island near us, and she told me that she thought she was losing her dad, that I was on my deathbed. My wife told me she too believed that I was dying.

God was gracious, and has restored me almost back to where I was before they lit up that scoreboard. While I now expect full restoration, I experienced some significant learning in this incident.

I learned how valuable, wonderful and good it is to have someone who cares for you when you are down, when there is a crisis and you need help. I urge you not to wait until crisis comes, but to begin to express that caring for your spouse starting right now and by so doing, to build a relationship that will reward both of you all day everyday.

Leona Choy, Andrew & Emma Murray: An Intimate Portrait of Their Marriage and Ministry (Winchester, Virginia: Golden Morning Publishing, 2000), 269 pages.

This book did not disappoint me. Historical biographies that are both easy reading and entertaining are, after a hard day’s work, to be valued. This is one such biography. Written in a style that is both popular and easy to digest, it is at the same time a book that leads the reader into an ever deepening appreciation and admiration of the subjects, the Rev. Andrew Murray and his wife Emma. No reader should be afraid of this book. It is accessible and understandable to anyone who can read.

Before absorbing this book, my knowledge of Andrew Murray was only fleeting: I had read one of his books, but was aware of little about him. Leona Choy’s work so captured my interest that it drew me onto the internet, where a few of Murray’s works are freely available, and this has led me into a treasure trove of rich, spiritual Christian writing at the hands of this leader of the South African church and “higher life” movement at the beginning of the twentieth century. Murray’s works have a devotional depth and love of Scripture that make them an invaluable for Christians today, especially for those wishing to engage with issues of spiritual renewal who come from a Reformed background.

This engaging biography has an invaluable appendix containing a bibliographical listing of Andrew Murray’s works. To be fully recommended as both an entertaining and edifying read.

Reviewed by James Purves